如果

如果你现在还在世，我会不会像现在那么想你呢？
如果你还能偶尔send一封温馨的sms，我会不会去看回你之前所发给我的sms呢？

人生啊。就是要等到失去的时候，才会珍惜~

你说对不对？

我想太多了吗？

我怀疑，一直以来都是我想太多了～
你对我的好，似乎是因为你的人真的很好～
但有时候，却不那么认为～

你帮了我，是因为你对每个人都是这样吗？

还是…… 是因为我呢？

看着你和其他人走得近时，我开始吃醋了～
却要当着一切都很正常……
必须笑着，当作若无其事～
我傻吗？

告诉我，到底，这一切，是我，想太多了吗？

我不想再这样下去了，
一个人这样下去，我怕我再一次，被自己伤害了～

where's myself?

halo readers! (hhmmm... i bet there's no reader reading anyways)

being so down today~
why? being pang bui ki today o~
it's a normal thing? ya, it is...
then why are u down of? sigh...

just a few thoughts in my mind?
whats the purpose u treat ppl nice n good?
make myself happier or... scared ppl dislike u?
what do u get for doing so?
happy.... or just something ppl take it for granted?
are u being yourself while u're doing so?
yes... oh well! it's a NO. i lost my principle for that!

you said u're dissapointed i dont borrow u my guitar.
oh please! it's new.. of coz i sayang it ma...
takkan i dun borrow, like that u beh song me ma rite?
so... because of that, so borrowed mine to u...
n then? what did i get? tiredness carrying back!
n what again? i dun sense any happiness for me when i borrow my guitar out wa~


i feel so stupid doing all these kind of things to try to make them happy...
but where diana? I can't find myself anymore~~~~~~~
everyday scared ppl angry of u...
everyday trying ur best to be someone reliable?
whats the point of doing that?
losing ur own self-characteristic...
so whats the point?
WHATS THE POINT?!

^^

i like the feeling he's waiting for me today~

i feel safe and someone to rely on~

Feelings~

it's been awhile since i left my blog abandoned.

oh ya!
grandma passed away edi~
after the few days i did the last post.
honest speaking, i was not sad..
maybe i was prepared for that... =)

life at campus now... damn busy...
busy about presentation, notice board competition, keroncong...

oh ya! i spent RM300++ on a guitar...
hehek... hope it worth it!

i'm trying to make myself happy,
but why?
i still feel something is missing?
someone who i can really talk to...

mayb it's my faith i wont meet my another partner?
i may seem desperate, but i'm not, ok?
i still have my own principle!
i can't stand reading love story.
i cant stand reading love notes on facebook!
i can't stand ppl's facebook punya couple photo!
i can't stand ppl saying how good is it to have another half!
i can't stand ppl's facebook saying in relationship!
i can't stand ppl starting a new relationship!
i can't stand listening to love song!
ARGH!!!!!!! kill me! i running away with all of these..
i feel so damn down knowing all of these.
it's not like i dislike couple, juz felt so kosong... =(

i'm trying to make myself feel that i'm actually used to the single life,
but i'm not lo!

fine! get used to it! there's no other way to choose anyway...

gambateh!

visited my grandma today... seeing very ill and getting skinner and skinner...
my heart felt sad...

her daughters came and visited her..
they cried, they asked about her condition.
to me, it seems like they have not been visiting their mom for ages...
as grandma's condition is not this 2 days...
is this what a child should do to their parents...
i doubt.

there's no point for you to cry or ask about her condition till this very last moment when all this while u don't even care about her...

complaining she brought alot of trouble to u guys is not the way u treat your mother who actually gave birth to you!
she does not ask for it...
so please! to you-know-who-you-are: don't treat her like that!
do you want your children to treat you as how you treat your mom now next time?
believe in karma, it really happens!

maybe, just maybe. when u really loose someone you love, then you know how to appreciate the others isn't it?

Enviness

i think it's a sin to envy someone close to you who get what you always wanted to achieve but nowhere far from you....

I admit, i'm jealous~

I'm jealous that i cant get what i want but others got~

It's a bad sin!

My inner self is fighting.

I know i've shouldnt do this, but i just cant stop it!

"Jealousy is simply and clearly the fear that you do not have value. Jealousy scans for evidence to prove the point - that others will be preferred and rewarded more than you. There is only one alternative - self-value. If you cannot love yourself, you will not believe that you are loved. You will always think it's a mistake or luck. Take your eyes off others and turn the scanner within. Find the seeds of your jealousy, clear the old voices and experiences. Put all the energy into building your personal and emotional security. Then you will be the one others envy, and you can remember the pain and reach out to them." ~Jennifer James

Yes! Self-value... Find my weakness! change it!

Love myself more!

Wheee... lai lai.... we go shopping!

I should support her~

I didn't get it now, maybe i juz need more time achieve it harder next time...

Opportunity doesn't come to you,

Opportunity comes from your hardwork,

Strive hard! OPPORTUNITY IS IN YOUR HAND!

Love you, cousin... ^^

我想谈恋爱了^^

我好想有人来保护我。

我好想有人来疼我。

我好像有人来爱我。

我好像有人来给我撒娇。

我想要有人牵着我的手，拉着我走。

羡慕别人出双入多的感觉。

我累了，想找个肩膀来靠

让我依赖……

爱情之神，您几时会注意到我呢？

我在等“你”的出现

你知道我在这里等着你吗？
很笨对不对？
我傻吗？

你到底在哪里？

Stamina

i feel so lauya....
not good at PJ at all....
no stamina...
felt so left out from my group...
everyone running, me alone left behind or stop...
coz no stamina....

stupid me...
why so lauya?